Nick Jimenez

Sunday, July 30, 2000

The heart of the matter

Dick Cheney had hardly said "yes" to George W. Bush’s invitation to be his running mate on the Republican presidential ticket when he got the customary warm greeting reserved for anyone foolhardy enough to wander into national politics: a complete undressing of his past voting record, personal history, financial records and health picture.
   Cheney’s public persona has been pretty much shaped by his stint as defense secretary during the Gulf War, one of that triumvirate (Colin Powell and President Bush being the other members) that directed one of the most successful military operations in recent history.
   But soon we were to learn more: As a congressman from Wyoming he had once opposed banning so-called "cop killer" bullets and easy-to-conceal plastic guns and had voted against Head Start. Pro-choicers rose to point out his vote on abortion, and environmental groups slammed his vote against the Clean Water Act in 1987.
   The public can gauge for itself in the coming months whether the votes viewed with alarm by Democrats or Cheney’s solid record in the Pentagon and as chief of staff in the Ford White House will govern which way they will cast their ballot. That his voting record was dredged up is no surprise and is in fact mandatory. All’s fair in politics and Toughman contests.
  But there is one piece of Cheney history that bobbed up that was immediately seized upon as a possible disqualifier for a man who might be one heartbeat away from the presidency: Cheney had quadruple-heart bypass surgery in 1988.
   Heart disease was once the kind of thing that was guaranteed to turn people into invalids. And perhaps in some minds just the whisper of heart disease is still enough to put the thumbs down on many a prospect.
  But no more. Hundreds of thousands of coronary bypasses are done each year in American hospitals, to the famous and infamous, to the well known and unknown. Among those on the list of luminaries who have had their chest opened and their heart plumbing reworked are pro-football coach Dan Reeves, entertainers David Letterman and Larry King and business tycoon Michael Eisner. Among the lesser lights is yours truly.
   Reeves bounced back so well from his bypass surgery that he was able to take his club to the Super Bowl the same season as his ticket to the operating room was stamped. Letterman came back in short order with his wit as acerbic as before the scalpel touched him.
   There might be a lot of reasons why Dick Cheney might or might not be vice presidential (or presidential) material, but whether he had a heart bypass ought not to be one of them.
   Sure, his physical fitness is an issue. As long as he lays off the chocolate eclairs and gets out of his chair once in a while, the guy ought to do fine. In other words, he should use the same common sense as anyone who wants to avoid keeling over one day. But members of the heart bypass club should know that better than anyone.
   Because members of this club know that death is not an option, we talk about "LDL" and "HDL" levels ("bad" and "good" elements in cholesterol), triglycerides (more blood stuff) and "target heart rates" (how much huffing and puffing one does on the exercise machine) like computer nerds talk about RAMS and gigabytes.
   Fact is, I imagine I could have a heart-to-heart talk to Cheney about how he’s doing these days, compare stress-test results and laugh about the idea of anyone who has had a heart bypass being considered questionable to serve his country. Heck, we already know we have to watch our diet and exercise; it’s the other guy who’s oblivious to his own health problems we’re afraid might topple over.
   And while we’re chatting it up, I might also ask, "Hey, Dick, what’s with this crazy gun business?"
  
  

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