Sunday, September 19, 1999

Dirty talk is not cheap, especially in the workplace

 

Corpus Christi Online

There's such a thing as a Cuss Control Academy.
   Just the thought of such a thing makes me laugh like Beavis and You-Know-Whathead.
   It's based in Northbrook, Ill. It's the idea of a public relations professional, James V. O'Connor, who has been on "Oprah" to talk about it.
   My favorite of his "Ten Tips for Taming Your Tongue" is number seven: Use alternative words.
   "For example," according to O'Connor, "the Cuss Control Academy has identified 65 common expressions using the four-letter 's' word, and provides equally common alternatives for all of them."
   Alternative words can inject humor and lightheartedness into an otherwise uncomfortable workplace situation, says O'Connor, who readily owns up to being an ex-pottymouth.
   "I started saying dagnabbit, which is a ridiculous, old-fashioned term, but I find myself saying it a lot. And when you say dagnabbit, it sort of softens the frustration and people around you laugh. And so it doesn't make people uncomfortable."

   Cleaner alternatives
   Here are some cussword alternatives he and I traded around: stinking, lousy, ghastly, holy mackerel, fiddlesticks and my personal favorite, Land o'Goshen.
   We agreed that "freakin" and "frigging," which have become television prime-time regulars, don't fool anyone. "Everyone knows what you want to say," O'Connor says.
   If we had worked at it some more, we could have put together an alternative George Carlin routine: dadgum, dad-blamed, shoot, heckfire, hogwash, horse puckey, horse feathers, bless my soul, I'll be a monkey's uncle, give me strength, and let's not forget Uncle Jed's "wheeeeee-doggies."
   Enough already. This is a serious workplace subject, serious enough that O'Connor can charge $45 a head for a two-hour seminar.

   Legal ramifications
   And it's serious enough that businesses are getting sued. At the same time that society is becoming more blas‚ about profanity, workplaces are becoming less tolerant of it, say Bob Nichols and Beverly Swallows, two local attorneys who specialize in employment issues from the employer's perspective.
   "Those changing mores in the use of profanity have caused problems in the workplace because people have become pretty desensitized to it," Nichols says. "But for a lot of people in the workplace, that still constitutes a big thing, to hear those words used. It's a very interesting, difficult topic."
   Profanity sometimes is cited as evidence in sexual harassment and discrimination cases, Swallows says. It doesn't necessarily lead to a judgment for the plaintiff, but think of thelegal fees that zipped lips could save.
   The courts have held that employers don't have a legal duty to "purify the language of the workplace," as one judge wrote. But swearing on the job is "definitely not a good career move," O'Connor says.
   Swallows' attitude toward workplace profanity changed when she became a mother. When she was pregnant and the words began to fly, she says, she would place her hands on her belly and announce that she was covering the baby's ears.

   Jobs could be lost
   She adds a cautionary note, the courts' views notwithstanding: "We don't want to encourage its use out there because people could lose their jobs over it."
   That's what just happened to a friend of mine. I'll spare the details, but suffice to say that all of a sudden this subject isn't so funny.
   My friend's predicament reminded me of something that happened to me when I was in fifth grade. I called a kid a cussword and he told the teacher on me. The teacher wanted to know what I said and I refused to tell her. So she took me into an empty room to grill me. After about a half hour that otherwise would have been spent teaching the class, she finally got me to 'fess up to what I had said, and promptly informed the principal.
   I knew what was next: corporal punishment, which was a lot more popular back in the late '60s. Back then, the litmus test for a fifth-grader was to be able to take a relatively hard paddling without crying, and I knew from experience that I was up to the challenge.

   Juvenile yet serious
   But this paddling was different. It didn't just make me cry, it made me scream horror-movie loud. Then I was told that I had three more coming. All three were as hard as the first, and with each, my "Texas Chainsaw Massacre" screams rose louder and the school secretary, who was there as a witness, cringed and turned away.
   The story, I think, underscores how juvenile - I was 10 years old - and serious this issue can be. One of the worst experiences of my life began with a cussword, and in a way it still hasn't ended. I curse the paddler to this day.
   Losing one's livelihood, as my friend did, seems harsh, but O'Connor points out that foul language on the job is a symptom of a larger problem. He calls it "a tool for whiners and complainers," not to mention a "sign of hostility," a reflection of immaturity and ignorance, and a potential instigator of violence.
   So you might want to check out his Ten Tips. You can get a free, unabridged copy by calling 1-847-498-1496.   

 

 
Previous columns | Discussion forums | Home Page

---

SEND THIS PAGE TO A FRIEND
All fields optional except "Friend's e-mail"
Friend's e-mail:
Your e-mail:
Your name:
This page is about:

---

  © 1999 Corpus Christi Caller Times, a Scripps Howard newspaper. All rights reserved.